Say You Love Me Read online

  Not only did I feel like the world’s worst auntie for yelling at Jake, but I’d stooped to my father’s level, blaming a kid for something that was out of his control. I only hoped this was an isolated incident, and that I’d learn to rein in my temper in the future. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I ended up just like him.

  * * *

  Downstairs, I was not pleased to find Cesar and his brothers still sitting around the kitchen table. I wanted them gone, not just because after what they’d put me through, I couldn’t stand the sight of them, but I was afraid Irma would come back into the big house, wielding a fire hose of holy water.

  “You guys still here?” I grabbed an apple slice off the fruit and vegetable tray and leaned against the kitchen counter. “Don’t you two have a long drive back?”

  “They do,” Cesar answered grimly, pushing away from the table. “But they’re not going anywhere until they help me fix the plaster.”

  I arched a brow. “Plaster?”

  Cesar flashed a sideways grin. “The swing.”

  “Oh.” Embarrassment flushed my skin.

  “So, do you think you could give me Ariana’s number?” Esteban asked, clearly unfazed by my annoyance at his presence.

  I gritted my teeth, repressing the urge to whack him upside the head with his icepack. “No.”

  “Why not?”

  I glared at the guy as if he’d grown a second head, or in his case, another set of nuts. Was he for real? “If she wanted you to have it, she would’ve given it to you. Besides, I’m not getting in the middle of this.” I imagined my eyes were lasers, shooting holes through his skull. “You’ve already caused me enough trouble.”

  I shoved the apple slice in my mouth, crunching it loudly and wishing they’d leave.

  “Come on,” Esteban whined, sounding too much like Jake when he wanted an extra cookie. Actually, an extra cookie was exactly what Esteban wanted, and I wasn’t going to let him get anywhere near my friend’s treat jar again.

  Santiago nudged his brother in the ribs. “Let it go, homes. She said it was for just one night.”

  Esteban heaved a sigh, slumping in his chair. “I know, but damn, she was amazing.”

  Why wasn’t I surprised? Ariana had a habit of turning guys into love-struck puppies.

  “Esteban,” I groaned, rubbing a kink in my neck. “Ariana dates a lot of guys. She doesn’t keep them around for more than a month.”

  How did he think he could have a relationship with her after he and his brother had shared her all night? That would make for awkward material during their wedding toast. Clearly Esteban hadn’t thought this plan through.

  “I don’t mind,” he said. “I’d love a month.”

  Cesar shook his head, snickering. “And what would you do when the time was up?”

  He slumped even lower, playing with the pointed edge of his icepack. “I don’t know.”

  “Exactly,” I huffed. Getting involved with Ariana was like going down a dead-end road, and yet Esteban was willing to let his dick decide for him.

  He fell forward, burying his head in his hands. “I can’t stop thinking about her.”

  Santiago clasped him on the shoulder. “There’s plenty more girls out there, bro.”

  I was glad to see Santiago wasn’t affected. Then again, he reminded me of the kind of guy who got around, which made last night’s hookup perfect for him.

  Esteban sat up, looking at us with sad eyes that reminded me of a baby seal right before he was clubbed to death. “Not like her.”

  “Thank God for that,” I muttered under my breath.

  Oh, he’d been clubbed all right, and yet for some sick reason, he seemed to have enjoyed it.

  He placed his hands together in a prayer pose. “Could you ask her if I could have her number? Or maybe give her my number?”

  Cesar swore in Spanish.

  Santiago shook his head. “You were always the big baby in the family.”

  “Fine, I’ll ask her.” I twisted my head from side to side. I had the feeling that kink in my neck was caused by stress.

  “There’s a hardware store down the block.” Cesar stood, snatching their icepacks and throwing them in the sink. “Get to work on the ceiling.”

  “But that old woman is in there.” Esteban scratched the back of his head, sharing a nervous look with Santiago. “She threw holy water on me.”

  Cesar frowned. “I’ll do worse than that if you don’t fix Savannah’s ceiling.”

  I froze at a loud bang from the mud room. When I turned around, Irma was standing at the threshold to the kitchen, stripping off rubber gloves. “I’m almost through cleaning up the mess, but I need some supplies.”

  She pulled a folded slip of paper out of her apron and handed it to me.

  Though some of the words were spelled wrong, I was impressed by her neat penmanship, almost as flawless as a computer printer. “This is a grocery list.”

  She nodded. “It will get us through the next few days.”

  I rubbed my neck, wincing. Why did that knot feel like it was growing? “I guess I’ll go to the store then.” Even though I’d just gone yesterday, and Andrés had left enough chef-prepared meals in the fridge to last today and tomorrow.

  Cesar pried the list from my hands. “I’ll go to the store, bella.” He leaned over me, rubbing my sore spot with deft fingers. “Why don’t you book a massage?”

  I let my head fall back against his chest. “Oh, that feels so good.” My eyes involuntarily fell shut as he kneaded my neck.

  “Or you can go upstairs,” he breathed into my ear, “and I’ll give you one.”

  My legs turned to jelly, and I felt like I was melting from the inside out as he brushed the hair off my nape and continued to work on the knot. I didn’t think I would ever get enough of Cesar’s touch. He set my insides on fire with each deft stroke of his fingers. Why did I get the feeling a massage would turn into something more? And damn, I could sure go for a few orgasms after my stressful morning.

  The sound of Irma loudly clearing her throat brought me back to reality.

  When my eyes shot open, she was looking at us like we were red flags and she was a bull with a short temper.

  I reluctantly brushed Cesar’s hand off me. “I’ll go to the store. There are a few things I need, anyway.” I turned into his embrace, wrapped my arms around him, and stood on my tiptoes. “But I’ll be expecting that massage when I get back,” I teased.

  He answered with a chuckle and a sharp, stinging slap on my rear.

  I jumped, fighting the urge to slap him back. “Ouch!” I growled. I dropped my voice to a barely audible whisper. “Maybe Angus was right about you.”

  He leaned down, nibbling on my lip. “I’ll show you just how bad I am later.”

  Oh, hot damn, he was such a bad boy, and I so wanted to drag him upstairs and teach him a lesson, but the sound of Irma loudly reciting her Hail Marys behind us was like a bucket of water dousing my libido inferno.

  * * *

  Cesar

  My brothers and I stood in the center of the small living room, staring down at the tangle of leather straps on the floor.

  “How did you ride this thing with handcuffs?” Why the hell was I asking them how to ride a sex swing when I should have been knocking them upside their heads?

  Santiago’s grin stretched nearly ear-to-ear. “She did most of the riding.”

  Esteban shoved his hands in his pockets, his cheeks flushing. “I had a nice ride in it.”

  “Yeah.” Santiago laughed as the two shared a look of understanding. “He did. He was crying by the time she finished.”

  Fuck. Did I want to know?

  “Ever get a blowjob in a swing?” Esteban asked me, his cheeks turning even brighter.

  I did my best to keep a straight face as I picked up the chain and examined the leather and leopard-print contraption with two hanging belts and a set of stirrups. “No.” I’d never used a swing, but my cock stirred at the thou
ght of Savannah hanging from one.

  Esteban fell on the bed, groaning as he stared up at the ceiling. “Ariana gives a hell of a blowjob.”

  “Fuck yeah.” Santiago shifted from one foot to the other, sounding almost as lovestruck as Esteban. “And she’s got a tight ass.”

  Damn. I couldn’t deny I was slightly jealous of my brothers. Not that I wanted to cheat on Savannah, but I wouldn’t mind more foreplay. I wondered how she’d react if I hung up that swing in our bedroom.

  “Was there anything you guys didn’t do?” I threw down the swing, sounding more venomous than intended, but damn those pendejos had caused so much trouble.

  “We didn’t do much.” Santiago scratched the back of his head, his gaze shifting all around the room, anywhere but on me. “It was all her doing stuff to us.”

  Esteban solemnly nodded. “We were her sex slaves.”

  Santiago picked up the swing, pointing to the two stirrups. “Her feet go in here?”

  Esteban waggled his brows. “Or her hands.”

  “You want to hang it in your bedroom?” Santiago’s shit-eating grin was so wide, I wanted to punch him.

  “No.” No telling how many diseases were on that thing. I knew Ariana got around, and I sure hoped my brothers had used condoms. Then again, Santiago got around, too.

  “What’s the matter?” Santiago frowned. “Your girl not into kink?”

  I gritted my teeth, balling my hands into fists, which were itching to plow into my brother. “None of your damn business. Savannah’s not just some one-night stand.”

  Santiago backed up, holding out his palm in a defensive gesture. “Easy, homes.”

  “When are you gonna propose?” Esteban asked.

  He was a romantic pup, whose life goal was to find a woman to marry and give him half a dozen kids. After I’d caught my fiancée and her boss fucking in his office, I’d thought Esteban was a delusional fool. Now I wasn’t so sure. Savannah was different than other girls; a passionate, caring, beautiful woman, who for some strange reason kept me around. Was I crazy to think one day we could take our relationship to the next level?

  I crossed my arms. “It’s too soon for that.”

  Esteban’s eyes lit up like a kid in a candy store. “But you’re thinking about it.”

  “Maybe one day,” I said with forced indifference. Yeah, I wanted this to work out so damn bad, it scared me. Savannah was rich and beautiful. She could have any man she wanted. Why would she stick herself with a mechanic with a crazy family?

  “You really like this girl,” Santiago said with a note of awe in his voice, as if he never expected me to settle down again.

  Santiago’s comment was a nail hammered through my heart. I knew if Savannah tired of me, my heart would splinter. Like Savannah? No, what I felt for her was stronger than like. The realization hit me like a brick to the head.

  “No, man. I think I love her.”

  Chapter Four

  Savannah

  It was a bad idea taking Jake to the store with me. I was still feeling guilty for yelling at him, so I let him pick out two kinds of ice cream and a big package of cookie dough. Normally, he was restricted to one dessert choice.

  Irma had all kinds of special requests. I didn’t mind buying the five-pound bag of corn flour, but the wrinkle cream and stool softener was a bit over the top.

  I rubbed that kink in my neck while waiting at the check-stand, but the knot grew when Jake asked questions about Uncle Esteban. Cesar was right. I needed a massage. Too bad Cesar was busy helping his brothers fix the ceiling when I got home. I left Jake with them and went to a nearby massage parlor, but the girl was new, and she only made a dent in that huge knot.

  I came home and took a nap, hoping it would help with the stress that coiled around my shoulders like a python, but I dreamt about my father. I was a child again, sobbing on my bed and clutching a doll. My dad hovered over me, screaming I was a whore. I kept waiting for Angus to storm into the room and pull Dad away, but he never came.

  To say I woke up even more stressed was an understatement. As I sat up, rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I felt as if this dark aura was encompassing me, threatening to pull me into an abyss of despair. Angus and Sara had always told me to never believe my father’s lies, that I was a good girl, not a whore. I didn’t want to know what they thought of me now. I considered calling or texting Ariana to ask what they’d said to her, but I was afraid the news would be bad. Besides, I was too pissed at Ariana to talk to her.

  As I made my way downstairs, I was met with the heavenly smell of warm spices and roasting meat. I found Irma alone in the kitchen, humming to herself while stirring a steaming pot. She pulled a big dish out of the oven, smiling down at her food as she pulled off the tinfoil.

  Her smile vanished when she looked up and saw me there. “Dinner is ready,” she said gruffly, turning up her nose and carrying the dish into the dining room.

  I followed, impressed to see the food was already set out: enchiladas, rice, pinto beans, and a tossed salad with field greens and tomatoes.

  I clasped my hands together, pleased to see a big bowl of guacamole next to the enchiladas. “Oh, everything looks delicious.”

  She scooped soupy beans into bowls by our plates. “This is an old family recipe. The boy looks like he could use some real food.”

  Huh? What was that supposed to mean? Was she saying I didn’t feed Jake properly? How freaking rude!

  I didn’t like that Irma had set the table for four people. I wasn’t a snob. I had no problem eating with the family housekeeper. I’d grown up sitting with Sara, Angus, and the rest of the ranch hands on the outside patio or in the breakfast nook in the kitchen. After my mom died, I’d never been invited to eat in the nice dining room with my father and his various female companions, not even on holidays.

  But eating with Irma was different. How could I digest my food with that woman scowling at me the whole time, passing judgment on the way Cesar and I lived and how I raised my nephew?

  “Thank you, Irma.” I said through a frozen smile. “I can handle the rest from here.”

  But Irma either didn’t hear me or else chose to ignore me. She sat at the head of the table and scooped food on her plate.

  Wow. Just fucking wow.

  I cracked my knuckles against the hard grain of the table. “Irma, Cesar and I will eat dinner alone with Jake. We have a private matter we need to discuss.”

  Her heavy scowl pulled her face down in a wrinkle avalanche. “Sins of the flesh should never be discussed at the table.”

  Whoa boy! This woman was seriously testing my patience. “Thank you for your concern, but I will raise my nephew the way I see fit.” I stood, crossing my arms in a defiant gesture, getting angrier by the minute that I should have to defend my actions to her. “Please allow us some privacy.”

  “Fine,” she grumbled, scooping more food on her plate. “I will be praying for you.”

  “You do that.” I waved her away. “Thanks.”

  She stood, balancing a plate in one hand and a bowl of beans in another, tossing one more dirty look over her shoulder before stomping away in a huff. She stumbled over the threshold, crying out before righting herself and marching away. I couldn’t help but wonder if the stumble was staged or real.

  I almost felt guilty for sending her away. Almost. I was hoping she’d keep marching out the back door and to the guesthouse, but no such luck. I winced when she set her dishes on the breakfast table with noisy clanks.

  I got up and shut the French doors leading to the kitchen. That woman needed boundaries. Serious boundaries. But I didn’t know if I had enough patience or energy to set them for her when firing her would be so much easier. Then I thought about the look of disappointment in Angus’s eyes when he came to pick her up, and I lost my nerve.

  As I turned to get Cesar and Jake, they came into the house from out back, Jake clutching a football and wearing a smile. My chest warmed at the sight. Cesar was so awesome with Jake
. I wished Angus and Sara had seen this side of Cesar before they’d judged him.

  After they washed up in the hall bathroom, Cesar was first to join me in the dining room. He licked his lips as he looked at the spread. “Wow. The housekeeper made all this?”

  I leaned into him as he kissed my cheek. “I know, right?”

  I felt a surge of guilt at the way I’d sent Irma away after she’d worked so hard on dinner. I kept telling myself I was being irrational. I was paying Irma to cook for us, but I wasn’t paying her to scowl at me and pass judgment.

  “Have a good nap, bella?” Cesar asked, sitting beside me.

  “Not really.” I instinctively rubbed the kink in my neck. “Are your brothers gone?”

  “They left about an hour ago.” He scooped enchiladas onto our plates. “They wanted me to tell you again how sorry they were.”

  I eyed him coolly. “Do you believe it?”

  He flashed a sideways smile. “Not for a minute.”

  Of course they didn’t regret it, and if given the chance, I was sure they’d do it again.

  “What’s for dinner, Auntie?” Jake rushed the table, eyeing the food as if it was his last meal. “I’m hungry.”

  I did my best to keep a passive face as Jake sat across from us and dug into his food.

  “Mm,” he said. “This is good.”

  I looked at Cesar, who was piling his plate with extra pico de gallo. I wished I’d had time to discuss the Esteban incident with him before bringing it up again with Jake.

  I took a sip of water and then cleared my throat. “Jake, I thought maybe you wanted to discuss what you saw today.”

  He wiped cheese off his chin with a napkin. “Was Uncle Esteban in trouble?”

  “Well,” I hesitated, feeling heat creep into my cheeks. Why was this so hard?

  “No.” Cesar set his fork down and grabbed my hand. “He and Santiago were just playing around.”